Adrienne’s Back From The Front

What am I doing? Vodka Boy and I have so little in common. He told me the last time I saw him, while he was chopping beans to dump into a pan on his hot plate in his motel room, that he was diabetic. Type 2. Oh, man, this guy is going to be in trouble with his health sooner than he thinks. Anyone who drinks like he apparently does is in trouble, without the health issue that diabetes will bring. I drove home that night with little feeling at all for this guy. He has been a distraction, but I realize there are so many other things I could do to distract myself. But, something inspired me to go along with this. Well, the fact that he ‘said’ he flew here just for me, influenced me. But, do I really believe that? He’s got family here and a business to tend to. He also said he wants to extend his trip for me. Tallied up the cost of changing his flight, extra days for his motel and it rounds up to nearly a thousand dollars. The way he looked at me when he said this made me wonder if he’s expecting something besides my company for dinners.

He didn’t call the following day, and I really couldn’t have cared. The next day there was no communication until late in the evening. I went online in the afternoon, figuring he felt as I did, we don’t have any real connection, and I saw him there cruising. So I cruised. I was tempted to send him an email wishing him well, but didn’t bother.

Around ten pm I was on my laptop, cozy in bed, writing. My cell rang. I recognized his number. Didn’t answer. He left a message. Didn’t check. He called seven more times. I put it on silent. Not being available is something he does, not what is done to him. I didn’t do this to be mean spirited; I just don’t want to talk to him. And if he extended his visit it’s not my problem and I don’t want him putting it on me and I feel he will just from past conversations with him. I owe him nothing. I didn’t ask him to come. I don’t like him using the F word as much as he does. My response to someone who uses the word like he does, is much like when I step on dog poo on the street. It repulses me.

‘You’re so f’ing sexy…’

ewwwwww

‘I’m so f’ing full…’

double ewwwww

Some encounters leave you with dirty hands.

I just sent him an email and politely wrote that I didn’t see any real common ground for us to move forward on. I also mentioned that I want someone who drinks very little and who looks after himself like I do. I wished him well.

Cheers!

I think it’s time to take a much deserved break and focus on what I’ve learned and where I’m going next with this. Time to enter my cave and write it all out and not log in to the dating sites for a while. I need to prove to myself that this hasn’t become some kind of addiction.

This is Adrienne back from the field, in one piece but a little bit jaded.

 

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