Whatever Happened To So-And-So?

I can’t believe I’m doing it. I found myself cyber-stalking an old boyfriend. How easy Facebook makes it for us to ‘check up’ on an old flame. I don’t know what triggered thoughts of this guy I dated on and off for about ten months. It was six years ago. He was clearly not the man for me in so many ways. When I first met him, he lived in his parent’s basement and suffered from a speech impediment. I liked him for all the activities we did together. He adored me, back then. I was his first real girlfriend, so I claimed a high level of importance in his life. I wanted to reciprocate, but the day he ran past me in fear when a crazy drunken bookstore owner pursued us, I knew that I wanted a man who would be capable of protecting me.

But, still…

Don’t we all just sometimes wonder whatever happened to so-and-so? What’s he up to now? Does he look any different? Does he still stock his cupboards with essential oils, enormous bags of cashews, multiples of deodorants in his medicine cabinet? If he liked something, he had to buy it by the dozen. His favorite expression was ‘wow-whee!’ His child-like enthusiasm embarrassed me.

I’m not proud of my treatment of him. I wanted him to measure up to what I wanted and he just couldn’t, but he tried. He went camping for the first time in his life with me. I sat at the picnic table and watched him struggle setting up of the tent. He’d practiced on his front lawn days before we left for the wilderness. I sipped coffee and watched him frantically trying to look like he knew what he was doing. And then he snapped one of the poles. I sighed with disappointment. I was terrible to him.

I googled his name. And in no time I was on his Facebook page. I could access his photos and how shocked I felt when I saw his picture. Yes, he does look older. How sad it made me feel to see him again, like this. There was a shot of his girlfriend, the one who replaced me. You know how sometimes you decide you don’t want someone, but you don’t want anyone else to have him? That’s what happened. He met this woman and obviously he is still with her. They look so happy together.

For a month or so he was seeing both of us at the same time. I knew about her but she didn’t know about me. I can’t say that I was innocent leaving a certain intimate article of clothing under his bed, but she found it and nearly ended the romance with him. I know he begged her forgiveness and sent her volumes of poetry scribbled frantically. I know, because he had a blog that was public and I read his confessions to her.

Yes, I felt like a spy. Then and now.

I am happy that he’s found someone who accepts him for who he is and probably doesn’t make moves to try and change him like I did. Isn’t that really what it’s all about?

It was nice to see him again. I like the newly etched lines around his eyes. Gives him an edge he never had. I like how he’s cutting his hair now.

I won’t go back.  At least I don’t think I will. I texted my ex-roomie:

I can’t believe how easy it easy to check up on old boyfriends via Facebook!

He responded:

Cyber-stalking him huh?

And me:

It makes me sad really. He’s happy and settled and I’ve still not found anyone and totally unsettled

Like the pal that he’s always been, he wrote back:

One never knows. People may not be as settled and happy as they look!

Finally from me:

One can only hope!

This is Adrienne, reporting from the trenches. Next up, my topic will be about recycling and I’m not talking about paper products.

 

Whatever Happened To So-And-So? © 2011 Adrienne S Moody. Read the latest Adrienne exploit on Now.readthisplease.

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2 Responses to “Whatever Happened To So-And-So?”
  1. Gaboo says:

    “I knew about her but she didn’t know about me.”

    Very interesting line. There’s another essay in there, on what that means to a relationship. Why does one know? The one he’s honest with?

    Good reveals…
    and probably doesn’t make moves to try and change him like I did.
    One can only hope!

    I enjoyed the piece because the narrator poses a question and then we think the narrator changes, but we’ll have to check back to see. There’s always a bit of relationship stress in these pieces which makes them sort of addictive. Thanks for the inside scoop. g

    • Adrienne says:

      Thanks for your response, G. I think you and hopefully my readers will be intrigued by the next few additions to this ongoing online dating saga. There have been a few interesting twists and turns that have happened since this latest submission.

      :-)

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